Disappointed?

What have I become? Really? I myself wonder. Surprisingly enough, I have no answer for this one.

I have been questioned though. My legitimacy was, and my answer was missing. I have never been what I should have been as defined by others, and although it might be a source of disappointment for them, it never was for me. Quiet the opposite, I used to like it even. I tricked the odds, what is there not to enjoy? But today was not just any other day; today was different. Today, it left a sort of bitter taste, because maybe, it took me by surprise... or maybe because it was true. And what if it was? Should I really care? Am I really ready to fit expectations? Not sure. If the only value they perceive of me is to behave the way I was expected to behave, to be the way I "should" be, then I am clearly not. I might have disappointed you today, but it was a disappointment for me too to see that my only perceived value or "face value" is my origin and the implication of it on my supposed behavior and belief... just because I was born in a certain land or the other, regardless of who I really am.

Today was indeed no other day, not only because my identity was stripped away from me like a sort of expired passport, but also because it showed me how much I hate being in this role... I hate being considered as the weaker one while I always have been the strongest... And that certainly leaves a bitter taste.