I give up. I lose.

I will never have my peace of mind with you.

I give up. You win.

I don't care anymore.

I received my first car today! It's impossible for a day to be simply good. Every day has to bring you down. To break you just a little bit more.

I give up. I lose.

Morning anger

I wasn't born yesterday

So stop the bullshit please...

When what matters is going to sleep with a rested soul

I dream of a day when I will run in a field, like a child...
Or at the beach, or swim in a lake.

I dream of the day when waking up is no longer painful.
When the sun light is my alarm.
When all the beauty I can see is nature.
When I am alone, surrounded with the wonders of the universe.
When gazing at the stars is the best movie of all times.
When falseness has no place.
When all that matters is not paper money, is not buying toilet paper on my way back from work, is not wearing make up and being competitive on looks, age, clothes or sexiness.
When what matters is going to sleep with a rested soul.
When what matters the most is being ready, with no regrets.

Pushed to extremes

You know what

I am tired of you playing the yo-yo.

Every time I say to myself that you have FINALLY understood, every time I find out that you still didn't.

Every time I say you have finally had enough, every time I find out that you are still looking for more.

You really tire me. 

Knock knock

Happiness is knocking on the door! And I am opening.

What happened yesterday meant onepowerful thing: we are one step closer! I can't wait for it to happen.

The peak of today: early morning, or late night... I have been reassured that we are talking about the same things, and it means the world to me.

Happiness is home.

Evolution... survival of the fittest

Sometimes I would like to change it all. Close my eyes, and simply be shallow. These type of people - or women, that only care about how hot they look like. The ones that are proud of who they are, by showing off the number of guys they fucked, how cool and open they are. You know, the typical hot brunette, sharing pictures on social networks, a selfie in general, showing their boobs with a very... very deep cleavage, with a wink or a duck-face kiss. I bet they are happier! I bet they are more liked, and I also bet that they are seen as cooler, and more open minded.

Only wishing for it make me dull actually. How funny! Dull without the pluses that come with it.

I should stop with the sarcasm actually. Deep down, I am not this type of person, and I do not have any special respect for these type of people... don't get me wrong, it's not a gender phenomena... there are some men that completely fit the description .. just replace boobs and cleavage with a plastic body, or sitting on a hot car... that probably does not even belong to him at the first place. But what can you do, show off is the character trait that we live by today. Good hit for the old family values really...

Live to please. Transform to please. Be the dull doll, be the superficial one that thinks they are in a sexist-free society while they are living in it, breathing everyday the beauty value, the "freedom" of being and acting like a porn star. The sluttier the better. Isn't that right?

Live to please... Just live to please!

We don't look at the same direction!

I told you, we don't share the same values. And yes, I shared them before.

I don't want a replica of my dad, never wanted, and I won't start now.

Our parents are alike, agreed, but we are not like our parents...

Too much grey

It has some truth in it...

Some exageration,

And a bit of lies. White ones!

Courage to feel good?!

I really do miss feeling sexy

I know what I should do, but I have a hard time bringing myself into it.

What a mess my mind is!

The best of it all

I feel the happiest of all.

Great day! Great date! Great celebration.

I am really happy you liked both the trace of Italy and the trip back in time.

May, I can't wait!

Typical

What can I say, I am very confused.

No matter what I do, it's never counted for.

Never enough?

I would love to have a bit of recognition.

And a bit more of grown up attitude.

Time thief

Interesting night yesterday! After all that rain in which I was caught up, and the crappy smell of beer in that bar, I finally heard my magical words. These words that makes me happy. The ones that make me look forward to the promised future.

Good times stolen here and there... quickly, briefly but intensely. What else can I ask for!

Rumi, my poet of love

Beautiful quote from Rumi:

"I know that everything I give you comes back to me. So I give you my life , hoping that you will come back to me. "

Hint

I will give you a hint! Because you were too curious yesterday.
It has a trace of Italy, and it comes from Italy!
And ... it has red on it.

Any guesses?

You are not my valentine's!

Some are proud

Some are show offs

Some are hiding

Some are ashamed

And... There are some that say it's not their style... To be proud in front of all. To show to all. Shame? Hiding? Both? All!

In any case, and in advance,

Happy valentines! 

Gift, check! Happy moment of the day, check!

I am very proud of myself today! I think I made the right decision for your gift and I am really hoping you will like it! I do!

I also wanted to share that, although what happened today, I still think that we are in agreement and that this will definitely set the road ahead. Thank you for the happiness.

My loved ones make me happy after all!

Monday, bring it on!

The weekend went so quickly! We are already on sunday evening and just the thought of what is waiting for me on Monday makes me feel tired!

Good discussion this weekend because I think that we finaly start to understand each other. Not losing ourselves in the process is very important and we are finally coming to a common vision, to a shared set of values. I like this a lot.

Loved the pizza, hated the weather. Didn't find the coat but had a beautiful view on the future. Hated meeting Thierry... But I loved that you didn't want me to stop caring.

Monday, although I am not ready, but bring it on!

Just tired

How can I make the best out of it, without losing myself in it?
I am still wondering. There is an easy way out of it, but to be very honest, I am really scared to take that path.
Or maybe, the easiest is just to close my eyes on things, ignore them. Ignorants are happier, isn't that right? And yet again, that is losing myself in the process.

Allez, it is Friday after all. Not as expected, but let me think about the peak of the day: GOT PROMOTED TODAY!

Better late than never?

What will we say to our parents?

Well, I suggest this : "we fucked up, AGAIN. So sorry."

Do you think we should really reconsider our plans?

Building memories... over lunch and spilled coffee!

I have been told a couple of days ago to be more positive.

I agree. A lot of fun things happen in my life. I do have some really happy moments, that I tend not to share and concentrate on my sad moments, the ones that depress me the most.

I want to share the peak moment of the day. I simply had a great lunch today. We laughed a lot, we ate well... over spilled coffee.

You will be missed. You were my confident, my sounding board, you listened to all of my frustrations, problems, you agreed with me - maybe even if you didn't, because I just needed someone to agree with me... we guided each other in an environment of mediocrity. It was really fantastic!

These days will not be forgotten :)

Ready, ready.... AND ready!

Hmm, Let me try something new. I have the urge to write something positive while, at this very moment, I am in the least positive of moods. In simpler and more direct terms, I am a bit pissed.

So let me restart. 

Thinking about last week, the first thing that comes to my mind is thanking you for taking care of me while I was sick. I really appreciate it. That brings me to give you a compliment: I always knew that you were someone I could count on. That is one of the qualities I value the most as I was lacking it before. So thank you for being that person, for your family... And for me.

I also appreciate the diversity you brought to the routine we had. Going out more often, having fun... In a healthy way. I love it. Nevertheless  I think we should memorize these small moments in something I cannot lose. Unfortunately and as you know it very well, my memory can only hold a couple of memories at a time. My natural storage capacities seem to be very limited.

Finally, I think I am literally in love with your continuous effort (that I can SEE). So please don't stop!

Lovely day, and P.S.: gift almost ready!